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Music has been a part of my life since I was a toddler; grabbing chop sticks from mom’s kitchen counter to bang on our wall of hanging pots and pans. It’s like a sixth sense, something that has guided me my entire life. The Cure’s music, and every experience involved with it, has been the one constant thing in my life aside from family. The people I meet, the compounding concert experiences, the whole intangible phenomenon; it continually evolves as a passionate lifelong companion. And because I’ve seen how others relate to this journey, I want to share it.           

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The genesis of PUSH came from a pivotal point in my travels as a Cure fan. Society, parents and friends had always expressed aversion, noting some kind of defect of character for wanting to see so many concerts by one band. The word “fan” might as well be a synonym for “diminished one”. Although I’ve never understood why, I knew I had to cloak and downplay my passion. But in 1996, when I met The Cure and many fans from around the world, they were doing exactly what I was. Our pilgrimage was global and palpable; to the point of almost having it’s own heartbeat. I was compelled to document this shared experience before the passion dissipated.            


By 1999 I had been around the band members enough to gain their trust. They allowed me to hang around a little and film concerts, a somewhat ‘inner circle’ experience with it’s own ups and downs. This blessing and curse soon wove its way into the story; the story of me, as a young woman following her dreams despite all obstacles. My journey became the story of many: the Cure fan, the female filmmaker, the music fan assumed to be a groupie, the best friend, the young adult trying to find herself.            

Growing up, narrative music videos of the 80’s and 90’s were my daily bread. The aesthetic of The Cure’s early music videos is legendary, and will shape the tone and look of the film. The flashback footage will be edited and colored with those videos in mind – grainy, collaged, and softly colored with blues and pink tones.  The 2016-2018 footage will be much crisper and brighter, giving the audience room to step back into their own memories of what they are passionate about. The narration will be similar in style to newer shows like 13 Reasons Why. Additional comparable films are Amy, Montage of Heck, Dig, Heavy Metal Parking Lot, The Straight Story, and Almost Famous.          

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My goal is for this film to reach an international audience with worldwide distribution. I want the audience to feel what it’s like to go on the road and follow a band, to follow their passion and seize the day. I want them to walk away feeling excited, introspective, grateful for the friends who accept them for who they are, and accepting of their own inner nerd. 

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